Here our some of the questions I’ve been asked about my experiences at the orphanage. Please remember that it was a long time ago and all my memories were filtered through the eyes of a child, so keep that in mind. If any of you fellow “homies” have more accurate information please feel free to correct me.
Q: Is this a true story?
A: Yes, this is my life as I remember it, with a little bit a dramatic flair for artistic juiceyness.
Q. Were you ever reunited with your father?
A. When I was 17 I decided I wanted to find my father. I discovered he lived in Washington state. I went there. I was happy that I finally got to be with him after 10 years. He said he tried to find us but had not idea where we could be. My mother kept us hid out of revenge. But I had to come back east to get spine surgery and then I didn’t see him again for about 15 years. He knocked on my door one day and stayed for a few weeks, stole a credit card and used it) broke into neighbor’s houses- he is a bit of a bad element. I had 4 kids by then and didn’t need his kind of trouble , so I banned him forever. That’s where our relationship stands , probably forever. He lives somewhere out west, maybe Washington?
Q. How many girls were in your sleeping room?
A. There were four rows of beds, I think 10 beds to a row. The children decided who got the beds closest to the TV by fighting for it, although once a bed was won it didn’t change until the child left and then the next in the pecking order moved up closer to the TV. Only one elderly nun( Sister Ernelda) took care of the whole “Little girls dormitory” No wonder she got drunk every night and gave out a lot of beatings.
Q. Were you put together according to age?
A. The girls were separated by age- Big Girls (grades6 through 8)- Little girls(grades1 through 6)- , the boys were not
Q. Any distinctive smells in the dorm?
A. The only smell I remember was urine from peeing in my bed and still making my bed like I didn’t do anything, so I wouldn’t get beat.
Q. The older girls in your book wear uniforms. At what age did you start wearing uniforms?
A. The Big Girls went to an outside school so they had to wear uniforms.
Q. Where did your clothes come from?
A. Did the home buy them new? Or did you choose them from a box of donated items?
Each week the clean laundry was thrown in a pile on the first bed, all forty girls ran to the pile to pull out their clothes for the week. If you were lucky you got clothes that fit. No clothes ever belonged belonged to anyone, if you had a favorite you fought for it. I have no idea where the clothes came from, although the clothes I came there with were taken away from me and put in the community pile.
Q. What was your daily routine? Mass every day? Catechism classes every day?
A. Yes, mass everyday, school, chores,play (either playground or in bad weather locked in the gym with nothing but one basketball), long prayer sessions on our knees in the dormitory and TV at night. Sundays were visitor days when most of the kid’s parents came to visit. Mine did not visit. So on visitor day I’d usually tag along with a friend and absorb some of the extra love floating around.
Q.What did you do in the summer when school wasn’t in session?
A. We played in the playground and swam in the pool all day.
Q. Did you have chores like helping to fix meals, make the beds, clean the home?
A. We never worked in the kitchen except the dish washing room. We did lots of floor scrubbing on our knees (our knees got a lot of wear between scrubbing and praying) We also did day long sessions of ironing, the home took in laundry from the community and we spent many hours at ironing boards. Plus any foster home I went to demanded I work for my keep- babysitting, housecleaning, farm work, field planting etc.
Q. How would did the older girls routine differ from that of younger children?
A. I don’t know for sure what those “Big girls” did because I never got that far, I left before I could get moved to their dormitory (which was every Little girl’s dream) But I suppose it was very similar, except they left to go to another school during the day. Many girls got pregnant (they disappear after that, I’m guessing a home for unwed mothers?) or ran away, (runaways were common but if you got caught your head was shaven and you were beat severely by Sister Edward, who was much stronger than Sister Ernelda) so there weren’t nearly as many Big Girls, maybe 20? If that. There dormitory was far from mine so I don’t know that much about them.
Q. What was the quality of education?
A. I think it was very good. I had an intense curiosity about the world and a huge appetite for knowledge, I read all the time . I had trouble in public school before I came to the orphanage, I flunked 2nd grade. I excelled in school at the orphanage, I think because I had some excellent teachers who praised me for my artwork and writing (praise at those times was a good substitute for love). Also the structure of the orphanage worked for me because the chaos at home caused so much anxiety and distraction that I was unable to focus on schoolwork. Believe it or not the orphanage was much, much better than home with my parents. I had never even seen sheets on a bed till I got there! Sheets! What an amazing feeling! And food, even if it wasn’t the greatest food - it was still food. We had cornbread most morning with syrup and I still love it. We often had nothing to eat at home. I found out at age 45 that I have ADHD, which explains a lot. The orphanage gave me the confidence academically to keep going to school , I have a 3 Bachelor’s degrees in psychology, Science and professional writing and an associate’s in Graphic design, I’m 9 credits short of a nursing degree. I suppose sometime I’ll start taking master degree level classes. I always held on to that thirst of knowledge.
Q. Were you able to leave the building to go downtown, or to a movie or shopping? I noticed your scenes of playing outside. Were you free to go out whenever you wanted or just at specified times?
A. Never. You weren’t allowed off the grounds. Were were locked in the dormitory, locked in the gym, locked in the cafeteria. The playground was not locked! But we certainly couldn’t go there anytime we wanted. Except it was easy to steal the huge ring of keys because the nuns were often drunk or really old and sleepy.
Q.Did you have any discretionary spending besides the candy money?
A.No, even if I did, there was nothing for sale except candy.
Q. Was there a curfew?
A. As noted above there was no freedom at all.
Q. On Halloween did you go out trick or treating, have a party, dress up in costumes?
A. Halloween was not celebrated.
Q. How did you celebrate Christmas?
A. Christmas was amazing, this was the time of year that kind people and organizations really went all out doing wonderful things for poor kids. They would have elaborate boards that tracked how close Santa was - with lights and beeping noises. Santa would arrive and we each got a toy (later we had to turn it in to the playroom toy stock, we weren’t allowed personal toys) and all major holidays some families took kids home just for the holidays. I went to one who gave me all the same gifts they gave their only daughter. Which was about 15 things. A Christmas windfall for me! I had to give it all up when I came back but it was the gesture that was the best for me. To be treated equal as someone’s daughter was the best present anyone ever gave to me.
Q. How many children were in the home when you were there? How many nuns? Did the nuns handle all the responsibilities or were there lay staff, as well, to do cooking, cleaning, gardening, whatever?
A. Maybe 120 kids? 12 nuns? A priest. A groundskeeper.
The nuns did everything except the lawn mowing and heavy maintenance. I don’t remember any lay staff except the groundskeeper. The kids did all the cleaning and laundry. The nuns taught classes, did paperwork, controlled the kids and cooked the meals. The priest did confession and masses. I never heard of any sexual abuse by the priest.
Q: How did you make the pictures?
A: Kathy: I draw them from memory in pencil with a soft .05 lead pencil. Then I go over the pencil lines with ink using a .005 to .007 ink pen. I scan them into my computer and color them in Photoshop where I also add the balloons and words.
Q: Whatever happened to your brothers?
A: Kathy: They are scattered. Patrick lives in Canada, Jeffery in North Dakoda, Larry in New Jersey and Bobby in a group home in Pennsylcvania.
Q: How do I buy your book?
A: Kathy: I’m working on that. Email me that you want one and when I either get picked up by a publisher or publish it myself I’ll contact you.
Q: Are you writing any more books?
A: Kathy: Yes, I’m writing and illustrating a book about a crazy free love cult that lived on my road in 1840. You can click on the Free Love Valley Link to watch my progress, it’s in the baby stages right now.
